Saturday, June 7, 2008

It's Saturday Already?

Wow, I just realized that I haven't blogged since Tuesday, so unlike me! It's mostly been just busy here, plus this sudden Northeastern heat wave that makes considering doing anything at all seem insane. And it's been another week of doctor's appointments, and since that always involve a trip to Rochester, it's also the chance to run all the errands that I can't so easily do in my little town. So that was Wednesday and Friday, and Thursday we had a work "retreat"... which is, I think, a polite euphemism for "all day meeting that no one could figure out how to schedule during the regular year." Oh, joy...

Anyway, the good news is that we went to the leg guy yesterday, and he can find nothing structurally wrong with Michael's legs... not even anything degenerative in the knees. The bad news part of that is that he also doesn't know what's wrong... doesn't know why he gets so much pain in that leg. Thinks that it isn't his back, probably... maybe inflammation of the lining of the kneecap... put him on a course of steady anti-inflammatories, come back in 3 weeks. Ok. Michael feels better and worse, I think... better that it's not a lot of things, but worse because... well, what is it? Plus the doctor pushed and pulled his knee around a great deal, didn't hurt at all at the time, became incredibly painful later. Probably the unaccustomed motion, I would guess, but let's hope it's better this morning. (Yes, he's still asleep...)

I don't know. I think that a lot of the bottom line on this is that the only thing that is really going to help a great deal is weight loss. And he is losing weight at a reasonable pace... but yet "a reasonable pace" takes a while when you have a lot to lose. Hard to be patient when its so incapacitating. Hard to be patient when you want to be more active, but more activity just hurts. And you read all these stories of people who lost a lot of weight, and at some point, everyone walks, everyone exercises... and how do you do that when walking for more than a few minutes is so painful?

I am just finding everything in my world so depressing lately, and it's hard to shake. Hard to pick up another day and do the next thing on the list. I have to, but right now, it all just seems like a lot of impossibly hard work.

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